"Evil"

There is a bunch of people I always associate the word evil with. No matter how I try to convince myself otherwise they remain evil to me.. Read on.

I had early lunch today because I missed the most important meal of the day. By two in the afternoon feeling hungry, I took out my kerepek ubi – the only food I have in the office and made a mug of kopi-o. The ubi was hard; dah masuk angin pun. But what the heck, takkan nak buang. So I ate it all the same. Wow - sungguh keras.

At some point I thought my tooth felt different. It sure felt different when I sent out my tongue to explore some more. I checked it in the mirror in the ladies and sure enough, the ubi keras had broke my teeth. The gigi already had a big crater in it in the first place anyway. Many moons ago I was advised to do a root canal, but ta-da-da-da..

So I left the office early & went to the dentist. He said he might have to do a small surgical procedure aka operation if the tooth would not surrender itself peacefully. After he had tested the gums are numb he took the forceps and grasped the culprit and moved it this way and that. And made the chair sit up straight and then move the forceps some more. Move the light a bit. Straighten the chair again. And then had a go with the tooth some more. Get the lights right again. Tug and pull the tooth some more. And more. And more. And all the while I was thinking, would I jump if it hurts?

After much resistance the tooth gave in and lost the battle. It broke into two but came out intact in two big pieces. The dentist said relax, it is all done. He said I look like I needed antibiotics and definitely some pain killer. I personally thought I needed some strong drugs to calm my nerves.

It wasn’t so bad actually come to think of it. It didn’t hurt. Maybe I’ve conquered some of the evil living in the dentists’ world after all..? (and yes, yes I know - lagi teruk dari budak kecik!)

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Books, Books And More Books Part 22

And I have officially finished my third book for the year (yeayyy..) These days that is an accomplishment as my zest for reading have somewhat deserted me. Or maybe I should rephrase that - I've grown up (finally!) and now am reading a bit more serious stuff. And I will also share ALL books that I read, including those I was too shy to show previously too (haha; me, shy? Dont you believe it!) I came to realize that doing good is actually contagious (and I had meant to write a post on this title for quite some time too. I surely hope I will seriously do it quickly because yeah, doing good is actually contagious).

Anyway. I finished this when I got tired of being sick. Too drained to read anything that's on the border of seriousness, I decided to read this. I have picked out the correct book this time as this turned out to be an age-appropriate book for me. With the relevant subject too (yes, you may go like, a gap year an appropriate book for you..?) And yes, I understand your disbelief - but I stand by my claim that it is a good book for me.

It tells me not to be too hard headed. You cant think you've got to do what you've got to do without looking deeply how your actions might impact the people around you. It tells me not to be impetuous. Being responsible is hard. And regrets are even more so. After that, saying sorry would be almost impossible. Curiosity can definitely kill the cat after all.

And here's my take - if you are in that instance in life when you think you are all wrung out and drained; needing to get away from it all, need a change of scenery - call me. I'll let you borrow this book and let it give you a wake up call you (moi..?) seriously need (I will go haha here - laughing at myself, actually). The book is pretty intense in that way.

And also at this time I am currently reading two books. One is on tamaddun Islam (I love that) and the other on Umrah & Hajj (reading that would make us so soulful). I'll share these too once I am done. But who knows when because I might just pick up another book (or two) to be in my in-progress list!

It had occurred to me we will never live to read all the books we want / should read. Dont you agree?

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Books, Books & More Books Part 21

And I FINALLY finished this last week. I’ve been reading it ever so slowly; a couple of pages or so a day. I think I should have read it in a big bang way. You know, all intense about it in a few days. That way the impact would be more dramatic.

The way that I read it makes me nod my head in agreement over some of the things written here and there and in the end the impact on me was very much normalized by other things that happen in my everyday life.

Nevertheless, it is a good book to read to get you motivated about (cough, cough..) money. Maybe I'll share some of the good things I read in here with you in some of my posts.

If you want to know about painting, you’d go to an art gallery. Read a lot about it. Or get to know some real artists. So if you want to know about money, investing, make (more) money you’d--? Fill in the blanks here in your own words..

Unfortunately, the book does not tell you WHAT you should be involved in to make more money. That you have to figure out yourself. We are suppose to figure out what we like, good at, blend in some passion and money-knowledge into that and voila, you MAY be on your way towards your first million.

Ps - Yeap, and they didn’t mention achieving that was easy either.

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Do Wishes Come True?

At times I wish I were a man. I figure I wouldnt be so expressive, indecisive. And bound to the feelings of the moment; not forgetting the mood swings. I am perfectly happy to be me at other times.

I wish I were filthy rich at other times. I dream of an unbelievable magical house, an array of posh cars. Contented at the same time. Happy. And contribute for the good of Islam. But who'd know who / what I'd turned out to be if I were truly rich.

Of course I had wished I were pretty - like every other day of my life.

And I wish I were smarter than I am. The things smart people do achieve is definitely something I envy at times.

And as far as I can remember throughout my adult life I have always wished I was handed a vocation on a silver platter the day I was born. I will forge ahead and never look back again to anything. My destiny awaits me.

(what a gloomy Fri evening this is)

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Happy Weekend Everybody!

So it is Friday (again). Did you ever wonder what you have done during the week now that the weekend is here again?

I’ve been busy beading the last couple of kurungs that I have and have also sent them off this week. It is the school holidays and I was at home on leave anyway. Photos below and more here.

So this weekend I am taking things easy (I hope it stays that way). There is that wedding invitation on Sat and the engagement party; also on Sat. I havent made up my mind which I will attend yet.

Other than that I think I will download some old music that I grew up (and grew old) with. I am planning to have my own collection of CDs according to the seasons of my life (that IS a long time you know). It should start somewhere from ‘I beg your pardon, I never promised you a rose garden’ song (what is that song anyway?) to ‘You Are So Vain’ by Carly Simon; maybe some of Abba and Beatles. And then on to Bee Gees, Streisand and Air Supply. And then John Lennon’s ’Imagine‘ to Journey, Whitney, Pointer Sisters, Foreigner, Tina Turner (you may insert your most unbelievable shrieks here..)

And I love Fleetwoodmac, Annie Lennox and Sting too. And I can go on and on when it comes to music.

Note that I don’t have current modern day artists in my list. Mention Rihanna, Lady Ga-ga (what the hell?? I cant progress beyond the debris she call clothes..), Beyonce (pardon me, but I am much reminded of the flanks of a tearing Arabian thoroughbred when watching one of her music videos), Madonna (to a certain extent) and Britney – and I will scream in frustration because of my helplessness to stop them from ever making public appearances again.

Anyway, yeah – other than this music thing, I’ll bake something – like the carrot cake I made the other day, but got no picture of. And of course the usual batch of cookies. Talking about food, I’ll share with you something I do have photos of – pancakes – which is so easy to make.

I am into reading again. And I do need to have some cleaning done (like in every corner of the house!)

Have a great weekend wherever you are, whatever you plan to do. Let's make each second counts!

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Precious Keepsake

I got this in the email recently; I think it is too precious not to treasure it somewhere as a valuable keepsake.. These photos appeared in July 1953 magazine.

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Complaints / Grouses / Grumbles Welcomed Here!

So how was your week?

Mine was terrible - I kept worrying about yuck, work. And other things have not been exactly fun either. Fun things were Glee, Idol, uh.. Wow, I think that was it. And oh yes, the one time I followed the police-escorted car all the way from Damansara to almost home. I arrived in record-time, of course.

I had also met a girl from the good, old college days - which spurred me to sms another friend from high school whom I had not contacted for years. I am actually thinking of holding a get together with the girls. That should be fun, like the previous reunion.

I am also reminded of and (re-)acknowledging that, I am a very emotional person; when my temper ran high this week and I had gotten over-distressed over these trivial incidences (fyi, opposites of the word emotional includes cold - which means being emotional is good, as you are perceived as a warm person..?? Did Freud had anything on this subject? ) Anyway. The trivial incidences -

1. Not read / deleted email notification. I take extra care about the emails I send out. I dont send just about any email to any Tom, Dick or Harry - I weigh the contents, its benefits, the consequences, the general interest of the recipients first. There is an honest / sincere effort involved to get each and every email out. The least the recipients could do (in my opinion) is to open, not necessarily read if they are not overly inclined, all emails they receive. Tak usah lah hantar not read notification balik. (And yes, the mood has been disagreeable like this almost all week long..)

2. The word wisdom has bothered me this week too. I constantly apply the word to the older generation (older than me, that is..), to the owls and its numerous species, the kung-fu master who builds his humble dwelling on top of the mountain and dedicates his life to do good for the universe.. The modern office does not convey "wisdom" to me - it is dynamic, competitive, innovative, on edge, flying even. Wisdom is sort of - I dont know - misplaced in some way to describe the office. Well, it is a personal interpretation surely. And I'll leave that like that.

3. I like to say hi or wave or indicate my recognition if not smile at people I know / met before / sat with in some meeting or another. After all, I do have a warm personality (yeah, yeah..). It bothers me (very much so, I discovered) when people I know dont do the same when they see me or even worse, they make extra effort to avoid me (this happens). It made me want to go up to them and ask if I am invisible / did or said something they didnt like or was out of line somewhere. After all I am loud, I have a big mouth, I swear all the time - but please, please believe me when I say that I am kind to animals and I do have a good heart.. (I think, but then dont we all think the same along this line?)

.... (yes, the things that go through my head make me wonder about me too sometimes)

But, (say this out loud with me) where else could we throw tantrums if not on our very own blog?

And after all that grouses aired, I wish happy cuti sekolah to all mums who are taking leave next week!

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Say A Little Prayer For Me

At one point I had thought ~ dah berdoa berpuluh tahun, tapi masih tak pasti tentang konsep doa ni. Then I found a good book that sort of answered some concerns that I had. Here are some points to share -

1. Anjuran / Keutamaan Berdoa
Firman Allah swt; ertinya : "Apabila hambaKu bertanya kepadamu tentang Aku, maka sesungguhnya Aku adalah dekat, Aku akan mengabulkan doanya orang berdoa apabila ia berdoa kepadaKu."
Surah al-Baqarah Ayat 186

2. Syarat Doa dimakbulkan
Pertama : Makannya harus halal

Kedua : Tidak meminta untuk disegerakan dan tidak bosan
Diriwayatkan dari Abu Hurairah dan lain-lain Rasulullah saw pernah bersabda : Seesorang di antara kamu akan dikabulkan doanya, selama ia tidak minta disegerakan, iaitu ia mengatakan : Aku sudah berdoa, tetapi (mengapa) belum juga dimakbulkan. (Hadith Riwayat Bukhari).

Ketiga : Dengan rendah hati

Keempat : Bersangka baik dan dengan berkeyakinan

Kelima : Menggunakan nama-nama asma'ul Allah
Firman Allah ertinya : "Dan Allah mempunyai beberapa nama yang sangat baik (asma'ul husna), oleh kerana itu berdoalah kepadaNya dengan nama-nama itu. (Surah al-A'raf Ayat 180)

Keenam : Dengan penuh takut dan besungguh-sungguh ingin dimakbulkan

3. Waktu Mustajab Berdoa
a. Tengah malam
b. Sesudah azan
c. Sesudah solat wajib
d. Pada hari Jumaat - Dari Abu Hurairah : Sesungguhnya Rasulullah telah menceritakan tentang (keistimewaan) hari Jumaat, lalu ia bersabda : Padanya ada satu saat yang tidak seorang hamba Muslim pun yang mencocokinya sedang ia tengah berdiri solat, lalu ia meminta sesuatu kepada Allah, melainkan Ia akan memberinya. (Hadith Riwayat Bukhari, Muslim)
e. Pada hari Arafah
f. Di bulan ramadhan
g. Doa seorang muslim kepada sahabatnya yang tiada di hadapannya
h. Membiasakan berdoa sewaktu senang

Dan dari Abu Hurairah ra ia berkata : Rasulullah saw bersabda : "Ada tiga orang yang doanya itu tidak akan ditolak iaitu : 1. Orang yang sedang berpuasa sehingga ia berbuka 2. Seorang pemimpin yang jujur 3. Orang yang dianiaya.Takutlah kamu akan doa orang yang teraniaya kerana sesugguhnya antara dia dengan Allah tidak ada dinding. (Hadith Riwayat Bukhari)

Selamat berdoa; bak sabda Rasulullah saw yang lebih kurang maksudnya ~ walaupun pada ketika tali kasut putus dan yang baru diperlukan..

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BB&MB Part 20 - CHICK vs CHIC LIT

I was surprised to see a section called "Chick Lit" in the bookstore the other day (pix below). I thought it is just a casual ref to that genre, you know. I guess there is more to chick lit than I thought. I always want to call it chic lit anyway - a feminist that I am - I think my version carries more weight to the books - not so frivolous in a way (at least to my personal logic).



Anyway.

I finally completed a book this year. And BB&MB is actually my usual Books, Books & More Books post.

Actually (feeling sheepish here) .. I didnt really finish the book as in "I read every page in the book". I sort of flipped the pages (the faster technique than speed reading) - so I know what the story is about. Not that my intention is to cheat, mind you; but I call this book the generation gap book.

This is what I mean - the book is written by a 22-year old (young?) author (not that I would hold her age against her, mind you) - the story is about a wanna-be play writer in NYC trying to make a go in the bad theater world in the Big Apple. The heroine sounds like a woman with cotton wools stuffed in the cavity where her intellectual brain should be. She partied; desperately trying to meet the right guy. Duh? Get a life. A serious life, that is.

I decided to cut short my pain in trying to finish the book and spend my (precious) time on better things instead; because the book got no substance and the language would make any English teacher cry foul. Coincidently, I wonder if this is all there is to chick lit. I will put this in the Chick Lit section; definitely non-chic lit material.


ps - let's hope I pick up a better book next time..

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Weekend Doodle

The new NetBook I got for free when upgrading Streamyx service arrived last weekend. It is compact and nice - but I have yet to get use to the small keyboard (not small small like tiny, but still not the usual).

It came on Sat - which was a packed day. I sent Eirfan to (his old) school for the UPSR prize giving. I slipped from school to go to my best-est of the best place (you can go yeah, yeah here..) - the pasar tani! Quickly got what I need from the pasar and SWORE (profusely, let me tell you) at the male (of course) driver who refused to rev even though he was in my lane! Dia duduk diam dalam kereta tak nak reverse; what a *&#@**! (fill in your fave word here).

I head back to school just in time for the head mistress' address and then yeay - the prize giving. We (Eirfan and me) took photos, chat with our mutual friends and then left for breakfast. I was glad that the event did not drag.

I left home after making sure the (other) boys were fed for Jalan TAR. I need beads for more kurung I am sewing (more pix below and here). I got out of that place before it got too busy for its pasar malam on Sat afternoon / night. I had to get stuff from the bakery supplies store too. I've run out of cookie bottles (I hate to say plastic bottles.. I swear I am a self-proclaimed environmentalist after all ) and we have cookies to deliver this week. Luckily traffic wasnt so bad given that it was a Sat.

Lunch had to be early Sat as Luq was leaving for college again after the CNY break. And Iman was away for a wedding in Bidor (sigh). Luckily I was already home when the delivery boy called and told us he is coming now instead of later to deliver the netbook - as I had to receive the netbook in person.

While I was cooking Ilyas said, can you fry me some nuggets to take to the bbq I am going to this evening? (For the life of me I dont get this nugget fascination / addiction / obsession) I said - yang, as far as I can remember, all your life you have requested for nuggets every time there is a makan-makan at kindergarten, primary, secondary and college days. Why dont I make you meehoon instead? (I am all tickled and laughing inside. I know what his answer would be). He declined (of course - but he knew I was teasing). I offered to make him some lasagna instead and he agreed (as I know he would).

So there I was saying goodbye to Luq. And then baked the lasagna. But guess what? It is time to think what's for dinner. The guy who worked today is now home and I am sure he is hungry.

Coincidently I showed the boys the back of my foot earlier today and they said ma, there's nothing there. I said, you are not looking at the big picture and pointed again to the upturned foot. They still looked blank. Then I announced to them, regally ala a queen - syurga di bawah tapak kaki ibu. We laughed. But I hope they get, remember and 'walk' the message.

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